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<issue>
<title>The Spectator 245</title>
<header>
  <number>no. 245</number>
  <date>1711-12-11</date>
  <author>Joseph Addison</author>
  <quotation>Ficta Voluplatis caus&#226; sint proxima Veris.---Hor.</quotation>
  <translation>Hor. Ars Poet. v. 338.</translation>
  <translation>Fictions, to please, should wear the face of truth.</translation>
  </header>
<text>
<paragraph>THERE is nothing which one regards so much with an Eye of Mirth and Pity as
Innocence, when it has in it a Dash of Folly. At the same time that
one esteems the Virtue, one is tempted to laugh at the Simplicity
which accompanies it. When a Man is made up wholly of the Dove,
without the least Grain of the Serpent in his Composition, he
becomes ridiculous in many Circumstances of Life, and very often
discredits his best Actions. The <italic>Cordeliers</italic> tell a Story of their
Founder St. <italic>Francis,</italic> that as he passed the Streets in the Dusk of
the Evening, he discovered a young Fellow with a Maid in a Corner;
upon which the good Man, say they, lifted up his Hands to Heaven
with a secret Thanksgiving, that there was still so much Christian
Charity in the World. The Innocence of the Saint made him mistake
the Kiss of a Lover for a Salute of Charity. I am heartily
concerned when I see virtuous Man without a competent Knowledge of
the World; and if there be any Use in these my Papers, it is this,
that without presenting Vice under any false alluring Notice, they
give my Reader an Insight into the Ways of Men, and represent human
Nature in all its changeable Colours. The Man who has not been
engaged in any of the Follies of the World, or, as <italic>Shakespear</italic>
expresses it, <italic>hackney'd in the Ways of Men,</italic> may here find a Picture
of its Follies and Extravagancies. The Virtuous and the Innocent
may know in Speculation what they could never arrive at by
Practice, and by this Means avoid the Snares of the Crafty, the
Corruptions of the Vicious, and the Reasonings of the Prejudiced.
Their Minds may be opened without being vitiated.</paragraph>
<paragraph>It is with an Eye
to my following Correspondent, Mr. <italic>Timothy Doodle,</italic> who seems a very
well-meaning Man, that I have written this short Preface, to which
I shall subjoin a Letter from the said Mr. <italic>Doodle.</italic></paragraph>
<paragraph><italic>SIR,</italic></paragraph>
<paragraph>I could heartily wish that you would let us know your Opinion upon several
innocent Diversions which are in use among us, and which are very
proper to pass away a Winter Night for those who do not care to
throw away their Time at an Opera, or at the Play-house. I would
gladly know in particular, what Notion you have of Hot-Cockles; as
also whether you think that Questions and Commands, Mottoes,
Similes, and Cross-Purposes have not more Mirth and Wit in them,
than those publick Diversions which are grown so very fashionable
among us. If you would recommend to our Wives and Daughters, who
read your Papers with a great deal of Pleasure, some of those
Sports and Pastimes that may be practised within Doors, and by the
fire-side, we who are Masters of Families should be hugely obliged
to you. I need not tell you that I would have these Sports and
Pastimes not only merry but innocent, for which Reason I have not
mentioned either Whisk or Lanterloo, nor indeed so much as One and
Thirty. After having communicated to you my Request upon this
Subject, I will be so free as to tell you how my Wife and I pass
away these tedious Winter evenings with a great deal of Pleasure.
Tho' she be young and handsome, and good-humoured to a Miracle, she
does not care for gadding abroad like others of her Sex. There is a
very friendly Man, a Colonel in the Army, whom I am mightily
obliged to for his Civilities, that comes to see me almost every
Night; for he is not one of those giddy young Fellows that cannot
live out of a Play-house. When we are together, we very often make
a Party at Blind-Man's Buff, which is a Sport that I like the
better, because there is a good deal of Exercise in it. The Colonel
and I are blinded by Turns, and you would laugh your Heart out to
see what Pains my Dear takes to hoodwink us, so that it is
impossible for us to see the least Glimpse of Light. The poor
Colonel sometimes hits his Nose against a Post, and makes us die
with laughing. I have generally the good Luck not to hurt myself,
but am very often above half an Hour before I can catch either of
them; for you must know we hide ourselves up and down in Corners,
that we may have the more Sport. I only give you this Hint as a
Sample of such Innocent Diversions as I would have you recommend;
and am,</paragraph>
<paragraph><italic>Most esteemed SIR, your ever loving Friend,</italic></paragraph>
<paragraph>Timothy Doodle.</paragraph>
<paragraph>The following Letter was occasioned by my last <italic>Thursday's</italic> Paper
upon the Absence of Lovers, and the Methods therein mentioned of
making such Absence supportable.</paragraph>
<paragraph><italic>SIR,</italic></paragraph>
<paragraph>Among the several Ways of
Consolation which absent Lovers make use of while their Souls are
in that State of Departure, which you say is Death in Love, there
are some very material ones that have escaped your Notice. Among
these, the first and most received is a crooked Shilling, which has
administered great Comfort to our Forefathers, and is still made
use of on this Occasion with very good Effect in most Parts of Her
Majesty's Dominions. There are some, I know, who think a
Crown-Piece cut into two equal Parts, and preserved by the distant
Lovers, is of more sovereign Virtue than the former. But since
Opinions are divided in this Particular, why may not the same
Persons make use of both? The Figure of a Heart, whether cut in
Stone or cast in Metal, whether bleeding upon an Altar, stuck with
Darts, or held in the Hand of a <italic>Cupid,</italic> has always been looked upon
as Talismanick in Distresses of this Nature. I am acquainted with
many a brave Fellow, who carries his Mistress in the Lid of his
Snuff-box, .and by that Expedient has supported himself under the
Absence of a whole Campaign. For my own Part, I have tried all
these Remedies, but never found so much Benefit from any as from a
Ring, in which my Mistress's Hair is platted together very
artificially in a kind of True-Lover's Knot. As I have received
great Benefit from this Secret, I think myself obliged to
communicate it to the Publick, for the Good of my Fellow-Subjects.
I desire you will add this Letter as an Appendix to Your
Consolations upon Absence, and am,</paragraph>
<paragraph><italic>Your very humble Servant,</italic> T. B.</paragraph>
<paragraph>I shall conclude this Paper with a Letter from an University
Gentleman, occasioned by my last <italic>Tuesday's</italic> Paper, wherein I have
some Account of the great Feuds which happened formerly in those
learned Bodies, between the modern <italic>Greeks</italic> and <italic>Trojans.</italic></paragraph>
<paragraph><italic>SIR,</italic></paragraph>
<paragraph>This will give you to understand, that there is at present in the
Society, whereof I am a Member, a very considerable Body of
<italic>Trojans,</italic> who, upon a proper Occasion, would not fail to declare
ourselves. In the mean while we do all we can to annoy Our Enemies
by Stratagem, and are resolved by the first Opportunity to attack
Mr. <italic>Joshua Barnes,</italic><footnote name="(1)" url="../december_footnotes/footnote245.xml"></footnote> whom we look upon as the <italic>Achilles</italic> of the
opposite Party. As for myself, I have had the Reputation ever since
I came from School, of being a trusty <italic>Trojan,</italic> and am resolved never
to give Quarter to the smallest Particle of <italic>Greek,</italic> where-ever I
chance to meet it. It is for this Reason I take it very ill of you,
that you sometimes hang out <italic>Greek</italic> Colours at the Head of your
Paper, and sometimes give a Word of the Enemy even in the Body of
it. When I meet with any thing of this nature, I throw down your
Speculations upon the Table, with that Form of Words which We make
use of when We declare War upon an Author.</paragraph>
<quotation><italic>Gr&#230;cum est, non potest legi.</italic><footnote name="(2)" url="../december_footnotes/footnote245.xml"></footnote></quotation>
<paragraph>I give you this Hint, that you may for the future abstain
from any such Hostilities at your Peril.</paragraph>
<paragraph><italic>Troilus.</italic></paragraph>
<paragraph>C.</paragraph>

<paragraph>1. Professor of Greek at Cambridge, who edited Homer, Euripides, Anacreon,
&#38;c., and Wrote in Greek verse a History of Esther. He died in
1714.</paragraph>
<paragraph>2. 'It is Greek. It cannot be read.' This passed into a
proverb from Franciscus Accursius, a famous Jurisconsult and son of
another Accursius, who Was called the Idol of the Jurisconsults.
Franciscus Accursius was a learned man of the 13th century, who, in
expounding Justinian, whenever he came to one of Justinian's
quotations from Homer, said <italic>Gr&#230;cum est, nec potest legi:</italic>
Afterwards, in the first days of the revival of Greek studies in
Europe, it Was often said, as reported by Claude d'Espence, for
example, that to know anything of Greek made a man suspected, to
know anything of Hebrew almost made him a heretic.</paragraph>
</text>
</issue>
